i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
