Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Randomize
