you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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