Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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