She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
