i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
my being single is dangerous.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
