i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
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