I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
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