playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
