Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
