Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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