There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Actions speak louder than pants.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
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