if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
