normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
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I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
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I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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