idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
