I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
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