I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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