How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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