Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
