This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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