I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
