Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
