You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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