i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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