I wanna bring you to show and tell
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
