And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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