He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
