I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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