carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
