Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Just took my morning after pill in the library
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
