I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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