god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
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