absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
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