When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Randomize
