dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
