No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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