Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I believe in your delicious
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
