You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
