dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize