Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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