im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
im six kinds of drunk right now
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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