I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
