He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
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