At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I could fuck to npr.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Verdict: uncircumcised.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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