I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
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