By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Randomize
