I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Randomize
