Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
