nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I think people are normalizing furries
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
