I can tuck mytits in my pants
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize